Tuesday, January 06
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This is a cologne from a company called Versace. Like VER-sayce. I think it’s Hebrew. The reason I think it’s Hebrew is because this MUST be what Jesus smells like. My good friend Isaac (also a Jew) got some of this frankincense for Christmas from his sister (also Jewish, noticing a pattern?), and I honestly can’t believe how good it smells. Like, I’ll dab a bit on and then have to have a heart-to-heart with my nose because I think it’s been on some sort methamphetamine for olfactory sensors. I would change my stance on abortion if I found out this stuff came from babies. Well maybe that’s a little extreme, but if this stuff came from innocent little angels (and I’m not entirely convinced it’s not) I would go to my friends and family and ask to rub their kids on my neck and wrists. I’ve never been a cologne type of guy, but this wonderful blend of “wild and aromatic plants including juniper, mugwort, and tarragon” has been around since 1996, and I feel a little empty inside knowing that I’ve wasted 12 to 13 years of my life.

This is a cologne from a company called Versace. Like VER-sayce. I think it’s Hebrew.

The reason I think it’s Hebrew is because this MUST be what Jesus smells like. My good friend Isaac (also a Jew) got some of this frankincense for Christmas from his sister (also Jewish, noticing a pattern?), and I honestly can’t believe how good it smells. Like, I’ll dab a bit on and then have to have a heart-to-heart with my nose because I think it’s been on some sort methamphetamine for olfactory sensors.

I would change my stance on abortion if I found out this stuff came from babies. Well maybe that’s a little extreme, but if this stuff came from innocent little angels (and I’m not entirely convinced it’s not) I would go to my friends and family and ask to rub their kids on my neck and wrists.

I’ve never been a cologne type of guy, but this wonderful blend of “wild and aromatic plants including juniper, mugwort, and tarragon” has been around since 1996, and I feel a little empty inside knowing that I’ve wasted 12 to 13 years of my life.